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As the funny meme goes, “It was a long year.”

I know I cannot be the only one feeling like January was just, like, a lot. Not only is the weather cold most places, but the twinkly lights from Christmas are gone, sickness is raging, the news headlines are scary, and business is slow for a lot of brick and mortars. 

As with everything in life, we can choose to focus on the bad or we can try our best to focus on the good. I heard something the other day that really helped me mentally during this season. If you’ve followed me for any amount of time, you know I’m obsessed with Cathy Heller. I have been listening to her podcast for six years. Cathy lives in Los Angeles and had to evacuate because of the horrendous fires. Cathy and her family drove a few hours to stay with one of her friends because the fire was literally at the end of her street. On one of her recent episodes, she talked about how she felt when she went to sleep at her friend’s house the night they evacuated. She talked about how she was greeted with warm food, cozy blankets and she laid her head down in a safe, comfortable bed. She was surrounded by her husband, her three daughters and her cats. Going to sleep that night, they didn’t know if their house would be engulfed in flames come morning. There were so many scary unknowns. But in that moment, none of the material things mattered. Her home in Brentwood didn’t matter. What mattered was literally right in front of her face. Her three healthy girls, her comforting husband, her kind friend, and the safety of her friend’s home. The basics. And she felt immense joy, even with the fires so close to her home. 

Recently, my boys have been sick. I feel like everyone has. It has forced us to slow down quite a bit. We are blessed to have this cozy nook bed in Lake’s bedroom. It’s one of my favorite spots in our house. This past week, I have been feeling anxious about a lot of things. The plane crashes in the news. The weather. The fevers my babies can’t seem to shake. Keeping up with all my tasks as a business owner. The fate of my parents and grandparents. Time management. House chores. The list goes on. 

But while cuddling my boys in the nook bed the other night, I decided I would try my best to fully drop into the present moment. All we have is the present moment. All we have is right now. We aren’t guaranteed tomorrow. We aren’t guaranteed the next minute or hour. So, what is going on right NOW that you can be grateful for? When I decided to be fully present under the covers with my babies, I noticed everything that felt good in that moment.

I loved feeling their chests rise and fall. I loved how the warmth from our bodies became trapped under the down comforter, making me feel extra cozy. I loved listening to Will tinker around in the kitchen because that meant he was either cooking us a meal or he was cleaning up from a meal. I loved the fact that we were on solid ground—if you know me, I hate flying in airplanes, regardless of the recent events. I loved the sound of our dogs snoring on the ground beside us. I loved the way my silky pajamas felt against my skin. I loved the smell of my new skincare creams on my face. 

The more I noticed, the more blessed I felt. Privileged, even. Do you see how fully dropping into a present moment can totally redirect your thoughts? Instead of sitting in that “woe is me” energy, you can begin to feel grateful. You may even feel super lucky. 

This is totally different from toxic positivity. Toxic positivity is when you totally DISMISS your negative emotions. Toxic positivity is when you don’t allow yourself to feel the sadness or feel the pain or feel the heartbreak you might be going through. I always think it’s a good idea to sit with your emotions. Acknowledge them. Feel them. Don’t dismiss them. Don’t ignore them. Don’t hide them. Find someone to talk to. I like to hash out my deepest, darkest feelings with my husband and two of my best friends. If you are constantly suppressing your emotions, you will eventually end up projecting your unresolved issues onto someone else—likely, the people you love the most. 

I am fully aware that our problems don’t disappear just because the weather begins to warm up. A new month doesn’t make the hard things go away. How cool would it be if the negative things in your life totally disappeared along with the with cold air? What if the pain and heartbreak didn’t have to linger month after month after month? 

There are so many people going through really hard things right now. Myself included. Social media tricks us into thinking everyone is happy, everyone is crushing it, everyone is successful, everyone has a clean house, and everyone has the perfect family. That’s just simply not true. We all have our stuff. 

However, we all ALSO have the capacity to pay attention to the present moment. What feels good to you right NOW? I know you must have some “good” around you in this exact moment. I like to sink into my senses. What do I smell? What do I see? What do I feel? What do I hear? Every morning, when I take that first sip of coffee, I try to fully savor it. From the moment it touches my lips to fully feeling the warmth travel through my body—I think it’s important to notice the good. 

You have two choices. You can focus on the bad, and you will find evidence to support the idea that everything is “bad.” OR you can focus on the good, and you will find evidence to support the idea that we can find good in everything. 

I’ve been through a ton in my life and continue to walk through storms daily. I don’t even want to imagine where I would be if I didn’t choose to find the good.

“But how?” is what you’re probably thinking. How can you find the good when there is so much sadness? 

Drop into the present moment. Make a case for why you’re the most blessed person alive. Notice. 

And then make this a habit. Do this often. 

Love y’all! 

Paige